Maybe astrologer extraordinaire Deek(tm) can answer this for me: Why has every single boy I never wanted to talk to again decided this is a good week to check in with me?

It started with my high school boyfriend, who is actually cool and we still talk every now and then, but I think he unleashed the floodgates. Then there was flakey unavailable why don’t we talk boy. Then there was a boy I went out with exactly once on the worst date ever. The date was so bad I wrote an essay on it for Salon.com and got published (anonymously- it was that bad). Now it’s a boy who I dated very briefly. We parted after a fight in which he said something so vulgar I won’t even repeat it, but it’s a common insult in trailer parks and red neck bars. It just reminded me why I don’t date uneducated mid-western hicks, even if they claim to be artists. Of course before this there was the married guys phone stalking (3 of them- blahhhh).

So Deek(tm) is there something in the stars that says it’s time for me to change my name and leave the country? Or maybe just my phone number and email addresses?