For a long time, I thought I was incapable of making stuffing that was yummy. I figured that since my drunk turkey was the bomb, if was ok if I was stuffing deficient. But the truth was, I was trying to make stuffing for vegans using shit stuffing mix from Trader Joe’s (FYI NOTHING GOOD EVER COMES FROM TRADER JOE’S. DON’T BUY SHIT THERE).

Once I gave up on satisfying the vegans and using crap stuffing mix, the stuffing got drastically better. The rules of stuffing are this: keep it simple, don’t cook it in the bird, and use tasty animal products.

What you need:
(This is to make a huge amount of stuffing. You can easily halve it to go with a chicken dinner or wevs)

2 packages of cornbread stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is good. This year I used some box of something else that was on sale. It was good too. )
celery
onions
parsley
sausage (I use 2 rolls of Jimmy Dean Sage sausage. But I have also made sausage from scratch using ground pork and that was so fucking good)
sage
poultry seasoning
thyme
salt pepper
chicken stock (Better Than Bullion is the awesomest. I can do stock from scratch but this way easier)
Butter (read the stuffing package to see how much you need)

In a large saucepan, brown the sausage over low heat so you can render out as much fat as possible.

When sausage is cooked, remove from pan with slotted spoon and set aside.

Add a wee bit of oil back into the pan to supplement the sausage grease that’s all ready in there

Turn heat up.

Add diced onions and celery. I use a whole thing of celery, including the leaves and saving the end bit to make stock later. Also I use 3 large yellow onions. Cook till onions are translucent. Add spices. Lots of spices. Then add the sausage back in.

Meanwhile, in a great big fucking bowl, pour in stuffing mix. Add chopped parsley (I use 2 bunches of curly parsley, but flat leaf is fine too). Melt butter in microwave. Measure out stock according to package directions.

Put onion & sausage mix in bowl with stuffing. Mix. Then add your stock and melted butter. Mix again. Taste. Add spices if needed. You really can’t go wrong with poultry seasoning the hell out of it. Really. And don’t forget the pepper. That little bit of bite is important.

Loosely pack the whole mix into a giant lasagna pan. Bake, uncovered, in a 350 oven for 45 minutes.

And that is stuffing so good people will whisper “It’s better than my…..” It’s also super fucking easy, so yay.