So Friday I am standing outside my office, sucking down the brain-fog clearing nicotine that makes it possible for me to function in my job. I don’t take lunches. I take 2 7 minute breaks* to smoke so that I can finish my work and be home before 7. And Friday was a doozey of a day. Somedays are easy. Some days suck. Friday was a sucker.

So I am huffing and puffing and enjoying the 7 lousy minutes I take of not listening to someone yammer in me ear. When across the park comes DOUCHE!

Douche “Hey Becky, I see you. I’m watching you. Yeah Becky I’ve got my eye on you baby”

Me “What the fuck. You don’t know me. My name isn’t Becky.”

Douche “Yeah but I usually get a name when I call them Becky and they’re all (makes an imitation that one would recognize as a shitty, racist imitation of an angry black woman- so sexist and racist to boot)’I ain’t no Becky, watchoo talking bout calling me Becky”

Me (I cut him off cause..just no) “Yeah well move along, I ain’t interested” (makes the move along hand gesture)

Douche “Bitch if you didn’t want to talk to me you could have just said nothing and I would have been on my way.. blah blah blah”

So that’s what happens when you say no to a street harasser. But what happens when you do just ignore them and try to go on about your day?

Last night, coming home from downtown, a bunch of guys standing outside the drugstore. An Asian girl tries to walk past, and since they are basically taking over the sidewalk she has to dodge and weave through them while one is all “hey baby, hey baby, you look fine, hey baby”. She ignores him and his friends. So the Hey Baby dude is all “Damn did you see that Asian bitch.”

We are bitches when we ignore them, bitches when we say no, and sluts if we say yes. Seems like we can’t win no matter what. Makes a girl want to go all Hothead Paisan sometimes.

*Yes I could take an actual lunch and sometimes do. But I gotta stay until my work is done and I am so over 11 hours days that if it means skipping lunch I will skip lunch.